Fake America

It has recently come to light that me, along with more than 167 million of my fellow Americans have been living in the so-called "Fake America."

What is this Fake America, you ask? Well, it's simple:

Fake America is where the worlds most important city is based. Fake America is where all the United States most esteemed universities are. Fake America is where freedom and tolerance truly reigns. It's where diversity is a pro, not a con. Where all of the money that the federal government gives the Real America comes from. Where you can walk the streets without being harassed because you are gay. Where a woman isn't seen as a murderer because she decides to end her child's life before it even began. Where the death penalty is cruel and unusual punishment. Where religion isn't shoved down your throat. Where the word "intellectual" isn't something to be ashamed of. Where all the technology that you Real Americans love originates from.

But wait, isn't it the Real America that tried to secede from the Union? The Union being the Fake America? So doesn't that by default make the Union the Real America? So how did we reverse roles all of a sudden? Oh well, not like I care - Fake America doesn't sound so bad. Thanks for proving that Fake America is the best America, Mrs. Palin. You rock.